Channeled by Brenda Hoffman for Life Tapestry

“Your New Home” is the title of last week’s “Brenda’s Blog” – her weekly channeled blog for

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Dear Ones,

You are beginning to note the difference between what is expected of you and who you are. It is a confusing time, for if you do not do something, who will? Yet, you do not necessarily want to do it. So you ponder your options and your needs. “Should I continue doing this because I want to or I feel I should?”

These new options were not expected for you are used to doing what you believe is your household, family, friendship, or work roles. “I’m doing this because I’m supposed to.” But for whom? You or others?

Perhaps you have expectations of yourself or your environment that others do not. So how do you decide if those expectations are outside your needs if that something is not completed to your satisfaction? How indeed?

When are your self-expectations part of your social world instead of what you hold deep within? And if you do not wish to complete something, how do you feel about yourself?

Many of your activities are tied to shoulds instead of personal needs or interests. Maintaining a clean home, repairing items, or activating work tasks that others ignore or refuse to do is not wrong. But if you are completing those items for accolades from others, you are acting on 3D shoulds. If you find yourself uncomfortable with a task not completed even though others could care less, it is a function of your new being.

Everything you do, think, or say is now spun through your inner being. So if you complete tasks for others, you will be exhausted or angry. And if you complete tasks that are unreasonable for your energy or skills, you will be exhausted or angry. But if you complete tasks that you find interesting and fun, you will be energized. A simple formula for who you are now.

Your formula was more complicated in the past because your central core of knowingness was limited. Numerous activities were completed for others – jobs, children, marriage, schooling, and holiday celebrations. Event after event to please others and deny yourself.

Separating yourself from the needs and interests of others as you are doing now can be frightening and self-anger-producing. “Where is my energy? Where is my interest?” “Why do I have to take care of everything?”

Your self-examination of shoulds contrasted with new interests will continue throughout this holiday season and likely a bit beyond. Your actions and shoulds are so deeply tied into your earth life that it will take some time to separate who you are from your 3D self-expectations.

That is not to say you are of 3D, but instead, that you are breaking many 3D habits you were unaware of before.

Why would you not want a clean house or a complete work project? If those actions are part of new you, you will not become angry, miffed, or sad if they are not held in esteem by others, for you will know they are your projects. And if others do not meet your childcare, employment, or home care standards, you might ask yourself why it is important for those duties to be completed to your standards? Are those standards new you or holdovers from 3D?

Even though many of you may be angry that something has not been completed according to your criteria, your criteria may not produce the end product you want. For is a clean house or completed repairs not a call for comfort? Anger, because something is not done to your standards, is not comfortable.

Before you do anything that feels exhausting or otherwise uncomfortable, go within to determine if that action is inner-directed or a 3D holdover. For 3D shoulds now create exhaustion, anger, or frustration.

Shoulds are never complete and never have been, for they are generated from outside your being. It is only those pieces, thoughts, and actions from within that will provide you the comfort you so need at this time.

A comfort that is essential as you eliminate what you were comfortable with in 3D. Self-comfort is your word and action of the week. So be it. Amen. To receive Brenda’s Blog, subscribe via Or, click the Subscribe Button on the upper part of her “Blog & Subscribe” website page ( and click the – Subscribe to Brenda’s Blog by E-mail – line. Complete your subscription by entering your e-mail address and accepting the e-mail confirmation. 

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