Stay tuned… to your own signal

Learning that I could “tune out” unpleasant energies was an empath’s dream.

Like so many of you, I feel everything. I look at a person crossing the street, and I feel them. I think of a friend or family member miles away, and I feel them. I pay attention to a bee flying through my aura, and it tickles—even feet away—as I sense their sweet little spirit buzzing by. I feel the love coming from my plants, and I feel pretty parched when I look at some of them! So many of you feel the same. You feel people’s desires of you. You feel their joy. You feel their upsets. You feel the ones who want to dump their pain and problems on someone else.

And in the end—thank God—we get to choose what we tune into and, therefore, what we experience.

The world is loud, and so are many in it. There are advertisers who want our attention, businesses, news channels, ideologies, religions, political factions—you name it. Not to mention all the people, pets, and plants in our personal circles! If I’m not careful, I’ll find myself getting up from the dinner table to answer an email that someone desperately wants answered. I love people. I love helping. But I have to really manage my tuning and my focus, or I literally feel like a bobber in a choppy sea—being tugged and pulled all over the place.

It certainly isn’t anyone else’s responsibility to manage my energy. I had to make peace with that tough—but liberating—truth years ago. The angels worked with me for a long time to accept it. They helped me understand that no one can “make me mad”—they can only trigger the parts of me that felt powerless, unworthy, or upset. They helped me see that no one can “make me happy,” but they can resonate with the natural joy that’s already within me.

We all use those phrases—and that’s fine—but when I started to take true ownership of my vibration, I found a freedom I’d never experienced before.

A few years ago, I had the luxury (yes, luxury!) of having a total stranger come at me with angry and unstable energy. But I was in such a calm and love-filled space that I felt compassion—and didn’t budge from my happy place. I felt like the Presence was speaking through me. They left cussing and upset. I went to dinner with friends, feeling weirdly happy because I hadn’t been wobbled out of my light. It was really something else.

So now, when family members who live near newsworthy spots in the country tell me wild and crazy things they’re witnessing firsthand, I don’t get rocked into anger. I listen with compassion, even humor, much of the time. We usually end the conversation laughing and agreeing that there are better things to focus on.

When people I care about are scared, going through tough times, or telling me their future is doomed—unconsciously hoping I’ll agree and feel sorry for them—I focus on their light. I focus on their connection with the Divine, the radiance of their spirit. And I hope to lift them up a little rather than being dragged down.

When I’m rushing around, unsure of how I’ll pack everything I need into one day, I stop, look for something to appreciate, tune into spirit, and simply say, “What’s next?”

So, while so many people and things vie for our attention, we get to choose where we place it. It’s a skill that takes practice—but one that pays off in ways that are so worth the effort.

Here are a few ways you can take charge of your tuning…

1. Practice Tuning at Will

Come up with a list of a few “happy thoughts”—things, people, or situations that you feel good thinking about.

For example, my happy thoughts include people I love, the antics of my dogs when they were on Earth, beautiful places in nature, and magical moments with my feet in the stream. I love thinking about my garden and that bowl of beautiful red tomatoes on the table, the scent of fresh herbs, and the feeling of nestling under a soft blanket or sipping a good cup of tea. I enjoy thinking of so many clients popping into their inner peace and power—and all of you on this journey together. I’ve even got a Book of Happy Thoughts where I write random bursts of joy and appreciation. It’s become so charged with positive energy that it’s like a battery packed with good vibes!

Once you have a few happy thoughts, set a timer on your phone to go off at random times during the day—moments when you can spare a minute or two. Or pick a set time each day. You only need a few minutes.

When the moment comes, focus on one of your happy thoughts. Imagine it. Let yourself feel the goodness of it. Remember how you felt—or imagine how you would feel. Just stay with that for a minute or so until you feel good.

Do this no matter what’s going on in your life. This isn’t about denying the tough stuff. We know there’s grief. We know there are politics and wars. We know what it’s like to feel overwhelmed, to fear for our finances, to feel not-so-great in the body.

But none of us want to stay in those spaces if we can find even a glimmer of relief.

I’ve never talked to anyone who said, “I feel bad, and I want to keep feeling bad.” You might not know you have options. You might not know how to feel better. You might even think it’s impossible to ever feel good again. But if you do this exercise deliberately, with sincerity, you’ll prove to yourself that—even if only for a minute or two—you can use your mind to focus on what you want to think about, what you want to feel, and therefore, the vibration you want to tune into.

2. Practice Maintaining Your Tuning Around Distractions

This is a little game to help you stay in your own energy, even when you’re around others.

Next time you’re in a place with people you don’t have to interact with much—like a crowd, a grocery store, or a park—pick one feel-good thought to focus on. It can be one from the previous exercise. Focus on the feeling of being inspired, peaceful, relaxed, or joyful. Once you’ve got it, see if you can maintain it while noticing the people and things around you.

Can you stay in that space while saying hello? While sensing the energies around you? If you get distracted, gently refocus on the good feeling and try again.

Progress, not perfection. The more you do this, the better you’ll get at staying in your own vibration.

3. Practice Emanating Good Feelings

This is a natural progression of the last exercise.

After you attune to a good-feeling space, imagine your peace, joy, or contentment as energy radiating outward. If someone scowls, emanate your good vibe. If they say Hi, smile and emanate your good vibe. If you see someone arguing, let your energy radiate peace.

Next time you see someone upset or upsetting—at home, at work, or on the news—quietly imagine your good energy wrapping around them. If you like, imagine Divine Light pouring into your crown chakra and flowing outward, maybe from your heart, your hands, or your whole being. Imagine it soothing them like a soft, luminous blanket. Imagine that you are an ambassador of peace and love, here to feel it and share it.

We do this for our own sake. We feel best when we remain true to our loving nature. We feel energized and empowered when we connect with the Source.

Of course, we’re “allowed” our sadness, fear, and upsets. Of course, we can get pulled into someone else’s focus. We’re not judged. We’re not bad or weak or “messed up” if we do that. But it does feel better to tune into love—and to emanate beautiful energy into the world.

As we prove to ourselves that we can shift our mood and our energy with our own thoughts—regardless of external circumstances—we plug back into our God-given inner power to create and attract what we wish. And as we become more practiced and proficient in our ability to tune our own energy, we experience a freedom beyond description.

I no longer ask, “Why do I always have to be the positive one?” like I did when I was younger and thought I was doing it for everyone else. I’ve come to realize what the angels have said all along:

The sun shines because it is its nature to shine. The birds sing because it is their nature to sing. The angels love because it is their nature to love.

And while any being in the universe can resist their true nature, we all feel so much better when we’re attuned to our natural frequency.

We are born to love, to seek what feels like love, to see love, and to express love. And we can do it—no matter who or what is trying to pull our focus elsewhere. It just takes a little practice. And the more you manage your own tuning, the more freedom and joy you’ll feel.

Without even trying, you’ll become a sun that shines brightly on this Earth—because it is your deepest, truest nature to shine.